twice the smartass, half the laughs
Only Weirdos Talk Like Pirates
Post Date: 09/19/2006

Okay, seriously, how many of you thought I was gonna write this in some kind of stupid pirate talk? No one? Really? Doesn't anyone remember me doing an audio blog in my pirate voice? Really? I could've sworn I did. Wait a minute... hold on....just a second...yep, there it is. June 18, 2006. It was called "Yo Ho Ho, and a Bowl of Ice Cream". No, seriously. Don't believe me? Go check it out for yourself. Go on. I'll wait. Oh, back already huh? Well, what'd you think? Pretty funny huh? No? Whatever. I guess I'm not everyone's cuppatay huh? Anyway, I guess the point is: No more bro. No more pirate talk for ole' Long Jim Silver. Aaarrrgh matie (okay, maybe just that one...you know, in honor of national talk like a pirate day, which, apparently is today.). So, what's up? What, you'd rather hear about me? Gosh that's sweet. why, I'd be delighted to talk about myself (surprise, surprise). Buckle in kids, cause here we go!

Um, I don't really have anything to say. I feel kinda weird today. Not bad weird, just weird weird. I don't really feel like doing anything (as you can tell, I'm making that happen). Hold on I'm taking a call. I'm back. Did you miss me? So, where was I? Oh, right, I feel kinda weird today. Lethargic sort of. Like I mentioned, I don't really feel like doing anything, except maybe taking a nap. But since I'm at work, I can't really get to that right now. Yeah, even though nobody comes back to my little hovel, and I could conceivably figure out a way of convincingly explaining that napping was actually part of my job (since nobody really knows what I do here), I shall not take the chance (as though I even considered it for a second. Well...maybe a second.)

Hey! I just got an email from my coworker Jason Louque. It's a picture of the pass interference call against Auburn that got negated when the ref determined that because the ball was tipped, it couldn't be ruled pass interference. Never mind that the tip occurred after the penalty was committed and therefore the ruling should've stood. Oh well, what can you do? Complain I guess. That seems to be every LSU fan's therapy of choice (Yes, including yours truly. It was a loud angry game in jimmy's house this weekend.) Of course (and you didn't hear this from me but...) maybe if JaMarcus Russell had played all game like he did in the last 54 seconds, it wouldn't have come down to a blown call. Know what I mean? Like I said though, you didn't hear that from me.

What else? Oh, Shelley, Ren, Gary, the girls and I all went out to the Mandeville trailhead this weekend. I got some pretty good shots of the girls with my new (well, not so new anymore) camera. I fully intend to post some of them (maybe like in a gallery or something) but as you may or may not know, my intentions have the way of paving my road to hell. That is: They're good, but to what end? I mean, when was the last time I even built a picture gallery? I don't even remember. See, this is what I mean. I have stuff that I want to do, but then I don't do it, and then I get frustrated with myself. Fun huh? Yeah, I'm a fun guy. Just ask anybody. Actually, ask my friend Katie who's MySpace page I just returned from and left her a picture comment in a very amusing pirate manner. I couldn't help myself. She changed her picture so that she's got a pirate hat and an eye patch on. How could I not comment bro? How could I not? What? What is this self restraint you speak of?

Well, I guess that's it for now. Yes, I know that this blog is lame. Yes, I know that it's my own fault for setting a standard of hilarity that is very difficult to reach consistently. I'm not gonna apologize though, and I'll tell you why. Hmmmmm, I was gonna say something sarcastic about how YOU probably don't write consistently hilarious blogs, or how most of YOU don't even write blogs at all so you can suck it. But that would be kinda mean, and I'm not really mean am I? Oh, that's right. Sure I am. So, later suckers. I'm going to kick back and have some incredibly masculine strawberry yogurt, and count down the minutes until I'm with my girls again, cause it's where I'd always rather be. And who knows, maybe I'll actually get some work done. And maybe my next blog will be chock-a-block full of funny. And maybe, just maybe I'll work on my website tonight. Well, then again, maybe not.

Until next time: Les, that license in your wallet, that's not an ordinary piece of paper, that is a driver's license, and its not only a driver's license, it's an automobile license, and it's not only an automobile license, it's a license to live, a license to be free, a license to go wherever, whenever and with whomever you choose.
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