twice the smartass, half the laughs
The State of the Jimmy Address
Post Date:

My fellow interneters:

It is with great pride (though hopefully not hubris) that I bring you this long overdue update of the state of the Jimmy (though I'm sure not many of you noticed the duration of time...or did at first and then didn't...or have been pining for months or whatever). So, what have I been up to? Nothing...AND EVERYTHING!! (Yes I'm very complex.) What's it been? Three months? Just a drop in the bucket really. I've been hanging out, working, playing some tennis (yeah still...I know. I'm pretty proud of me for that one too.), trying to be a good husband and dad. You know, the usual. I laid down some guitar tracks last night on my computer. Wanna hear them? Absolutely not! Last night was my official reminder that when you play guitar every day for a decade, and then lay it down for the same amount of time, and then pick it up again and expect to be at the same level as you used to be...well, it was a foolish expectation to be sure (hmmmm, I'm starting to wonder how long I can make this sentence) and an expectation which was quickly dashed (Is that right? Are expectations dashed? Also, in regard to the length of this sentence, do the asides count as part of the same sentence even though they contain punctuation. Let's just say they do. What's that? You agree? Yeah, I thought you might. Thanks.). Dashed and smash against the jagged rocks of reality. My playing was sloppy and I couldn't find my rhythm to save my life (Thankfully my life was not actually on the line). My fingers also hurt. they used to be so delightfully calloused. I had fun though and it definitely stoked a little creativity in me. Like everything else that I do though, we'll have to see if I keep it up more than sporadically. It'll be good if I do, because there's some kind of rumor going around (mostly in my head) that this band I used to be in called Voodoo Grove might be laying down some tracks later this summer. I've been in contact with our old lead singer Aaron Moreland who actually almost brought it up last time we talked on the phone. So, I don't really know. But I'll be ready if it happens.

So, what else have I been up to? Oh, I've been messing around in ACID a little bit. Oh right! I took a trip to the Chuck (Lake Charles - which is where I'm from). I went to see my cousin and aunt on my dad's side who I never see. It was cool. Unfortunately, my wife Shelley (don't you love how I keep mentioning people and then telling you who they are. Like anyone who doesn't already know me reads this.) wasn't able to come. She had some kind of porno convention she needed to attend or something. No, really, she had to work. On Memorial Day!! Suck ass. She missed a good time too. Sweet-Lee and I had a great time. My cousin Tristen has a daughter Emily who is Allee's age. They got along pretty well (Um...excuse me. I mean pretty good). Allee got to see all of her cousins on my side of the family, which is a pretty rare occurrence. My folks got a big spacewalk thing that had a slide on the side. It was fun. Sweet-Lee said she really had a good time too. So much so that it wasn't very easy to get her to leave. It was a great time but it was nice getting home too. Allee and I missed her mommy.

What else? I guess that's it. I really only wrote this cause I told Shelley I would. Three months to the day babe. No wait, that's not the reason. It was really because I just missed y'all so much (for sure). In fact, I'd venture to say that I missed you almost as much as you missed me. And that's a lot isn't it? I know it is. Oh, by the way, before I go, I've been totally into Peeping Tom lately. Have you heard of them? Are you a Mike Patton fan? If so, I highly recommend you check them out. Later gators.

Until next time: One second, Two seconds, Three seconds, Four and five Seconds to live. One second, Two seconds, Three seconds, Four and five Is all I can give. One one thousand, Two one thousand, Three one thousand, Four and five seconds again. One second, two seconds, three seconds, four seconds, five second, here we go!